From the https://www.kentonline.co.uk By Secret Drinker, 21 May 2020.

Secret Drinker reviews the Scared Crow pub, Offham Road, West Malling.

It seems a long time ago that I was enjoying being squeezed into the pub, now it’s the pubs themselves which are feeling the squeeze and times have never been tighter. It’s vital we all do whatever we can to support our local boozers while they struggle to survive closures due to the new dreaded ‘C’ word.

We all dream of the day we can again lift a pint to toast the future of those familiar surroundings we so crave. In the meantime, pubs are doing whatever they can to get by and we need to back them.

Takeaways and collections are the order of the day, so I’ve decided to take a look at what some pubs are able to offer.

I’m making a start just off the beaten track in a little place I’ve visited before in the back streets of West Malling. The Scared Crow is a pub/restaurant that is now offering a collection menu.

So, how is it choosing to operate and what measures does it have in place to comply with Government recommendations?

First of all, they’ve got a collection menu online for you to choose from. And, unlike some other places, it hasn’t been cut back to the bare minimum – there is more than enough to choose from with a wide range of Mexican food, pizzas and burgers.

Also, I was really pleased to see they’d amended their opening times and shown them clearly on the site, too many other places haven’t bothered and it can be really confusing and frustrating.

Just imagine, sitting in the beer garden to enjoy a pint! Well, hopefully one day before too long. For now it’s become the pick-up point.

The process couldn’t be easier – you ring up and leave your phone number, they then ring you back to take your order and allocate you a time to collect.

In our case it wasn’t too late at 6.15pm – which is good because I was starving and Mrs SD wouldn’t have sunk too many Sav Blancs by this stage either!

And, the ‘handover’ element is well organised too. Walking towards the pub there are clear signs requesting you collect your food from the back of the pub. You approach the back door and, from a safe distance, the staff can see you’ve arrived. You then stand back and the chef, who was wearing a mask by the way, brings your order out and leaves it on the side where you simply collect it once he’s back inside – it couldn’t be simpler or more effective.

Well packaged, the order was left on the side to be collected and social distancing was maintained at all times.

I can therefore confidently report social distancing is fully functioning in this corner of town. Now, I can also reveal I have visited this establishment in much happier times, though I’ve never reviewed the Scared Crow. Believe me, without the dreaded ‘C’ word and all the restrictions that go with it, there’s never been much social distancing here.

Getting through to the gents at the far side of this bar in ‘normal’ times is one of the tightest squeezes you’re likely to encounter. I’d go so far as to say that on past occasions I’ve been pressed up and so close to certain people I’ve unintentionally been aware exactly what they had in their pockets. Of course, there was always a lottery element, depending upon who was in, as some folk are more interesting to be pressed up against than others!

Anyway, enough of this reminiscing about happier times, though I do look forward to being crushed in the Crow again. I’m sure you want to hear about the food.

Having withdrawal symptoms, both I and the apprentice chose pizzas – I played a straight bat and selected the traditional quattro stagioni (ham, chorizo, peppers and mushrooms), the apprentice upped the ante and selected a Scared Crow (chicken, onion, peppers and jalapenos). I tried a slice and he certainly got what he asked for, it’s a fiery little number. Mrs SD kept it traditional and chose their ‘famous’ lasagne.

They each cost £12, as most things on the menu seem to, although some are a little more or a little less.

The early bird gets the mushrooms, well he does if you call before 5pm, and we did.

Mrs SD chose the home-made lasagne and even though it was delicious struggled to finish the whole portion.

They ask you to leave a message (just your name and number) they say that in return for helping the staff and keeping the chef calm you deserve a free portion of breaded mushrooms with a garlic dip to say thank you – a nice touch I thought.

Everything was beautifully cooked and my pizza tasted just as good as the days we had the privilege of being able to eat inside the pub, with a pint of real ale to accompany the meal – oh joy.

I probably should have paid more attention previously as, in all likelihood, they’ve always offered a takeaway service and I just wasn’t aware – but whatever the case, it’s a great service now and comes highly recommended.

From the https://www.kentonline.co.uk By Liane Castle, 6 July 2020.

Tree knocked down outside The Scared Crow pub in West Malling blamed on lightning by bin men.

A landlady has hit out at bin men who knocked down an historic pub's iconic tree and blamed lightning.

Tina Beadle, who runs The Scared Crow in Offham Road, West Malling came across the damage.

The tree was left snapped in the road.

Now only a stump remains.

The tree has stood outside the Scared Crow for decades.

One of her customers reportedly found refuse workers from Urbaser examining the incident.

She said: “A friend of mine saw the refuse truck and the tree which at this point had already been snapped. He asked them what had happened, one of the drivers said ‘oh we’ve clipped the tree but don’t worry we’re calling it in’.

“By the time I got there the truck had gone but when I phoned up to find out what happened, the company said it was caused by lightning.

“They said it was hanging down after being struck and their vehicle had caught it.”

But Ms Beadle, who has owned the pub for more than 16 years, is sceptical, after the tree surgeon who came to remove it said he did not believe that had caused the branch to snap.

Tina Beadle is the landlady at The Scared Crow.

“He said if it was hit by lightning there would have been scorch marks or burn marks but there was nothing of the sort,” she explained.

As the Scared Crow opened its door on Saturday welcoming back customers for the first time since lockdown, Ms Beadle said the incident could not have come at a worse time.

She added: “It was just another thing on top of everything else. Things are hard enough as it is at the moment and I cried when my customer told me what had happened.

“The pub dates back to the 1870s, whether the tree is that old I don’t know but it is an integral part of the building. People sit under it for shade and it's really frustrating it's not there any more.”

Ms Beadle praised the council for acting so quickly to remove the tree, but is asking for an apology from Urbaser, and for them to replace it.

Urbaser did not respond to our request for a comment.